The Day the Internet Died

It’s happened.

The internet is dead everyone.

Grab your veils and throw on your mourning best because we’ve got a funeral to attend.

Oh? You’d like to know why the internet is dead?

Why because some Youtuber people have decided to moderate or remove comments on their videos. It has killed the internet. And free speech of course. We should all take a moment of silence for the death of the internet and free speech.

Okay, seriously? I don’t understand the reaction that people have when someone decides to moderate their comment sections or their sites. It’s not violating your free speech. It’s not affecting you in any way other than maybe stopping you from being a huge fucking asshole for no reason. Most places have some form of moderation. Life itself is moderated whether you want to believe it or not. You can’t go up to your teacher and tell them that they should kill themselves. You’d get in a lot of trouble for that.

In real life the stuff that people say in these comment sections would be enough to get the cops called on them. And it’s not violating their free speech to do so. I wish these free speech whiners would remove their dicks from their hands long enough to do some self-reflection and realize they’re spending too much time focused on being a negative person.

But anyway.

Dearly beloved. We gather here today…


Finding the Best Daddy

Dream DaddyA Dad Dating Simulator.

Not a game I was ever planning on playing. Not a game that I ever really wanted anything to do with, even with the tenuous connection to the Game Grumps (I am a semi-fan of theirs). I’m not a big fan of the visual novel/dating simulator genres. I find them really boring and usually the writing on them (perhaps due to a lot of them being translations) is really, really awful. I can’t stand awful writing.

But I caught a video of a Youtuber playing the first bit of the game. And I did genuinely laugh at the dialogue and choices the character can make. So I decided to give it a try. After all, if it was shit, I’d know before two hours was up and I could just refund the game. Ten hours later and I have romanced all of the dads (Knife Dad is best daddy).

For a game that everyone is saying is a satire of the dating sim/VN genre, it actually has a lot of fucking heart. The dialogue is at times super cringe-y (it does match well with the Game Grumps style of humor) and awkward but it’s also really funny most of the time. Things that aren’t dramatic are made dramatic, the characters all talk like that quirky weird kid in college who wears fox tails, but there’s also clearly love that’s put into them. The relationships you can form with the characters are surprisingly meaningful. The situations they face, between the dads and their children, are easily recognizable in real life.

The relationship between the player character and their daughter is amazingly well crafted. You can choose to support your daughter and have a good relationship with her, or you can ignore her and dismiss her feelings and have a terrible relationship (which I never did because come on). Then you have the other dads and the issues they’re facing. Robert with the wall of booze and fake stories that he puts up. Matt with his love and fear of music. Craig just being…Craig. They’re all interesting characters and fairly in depth.

Of course, there are issues. For a game that ostensibly supposed to be about gay/bi-sexual men dating other men, there’s a weird lack of gay content. If I remember correctly, there’s not a single panel that actually shows a gay kiss. Which, I’ll give the game, would be harder to do with a player customized character but I wouldn’t have minded them limiting the options so that we could have that. It seems like such a weird thing to be missing from a game like that.

Also, some of the relationships with the characters aren’t that deep. Joseph is supposed to be a religious individual but we never really get that from him. There’s no questioning of his religion, no worries about what he’s doing. He’s in a very grey position for most of the game being the only dad that’s still married, but there’s never really any talk about that. And Brian’s relationship is funny but still kind of weird. You don’t really have much free choice in it. You have to compete with him, no matter what.

Plus the mini-games are terrible. I genuinely didn’t like a single one of them. They were shallow and felt completely out of place.

All in all though,  it’s a super satisfying game that I don’t regret getting.  And it’s not a bad catch for $15.

musings · Personal

Why Are Gamers So Toxic?

SJW: Social Justice Warrior

If you’re unfamiliar with the term, be grateful. Spawned in some dark basement at Dorito-encrusted keyboard with the stench of a crusty neckbeard hanging thick in the air, this term is nothing but trash. Anyone who uses it anyway but ironic can take those letters and shove them so far up their ass they puke them up.

If you haven’t gathered, I cannot stand this trend of calling anything remotely progressive as being SJW bullshit. It makes being a gamer a miserable experience and it makes people embarrassed to proclaim that they enjoy gaming. Or at least, it makes anyone with any common sense embarrassed to claim it. There are few communities that can be as toxic as gamers and it’s something I just don’t understand. They’re games. They’re supposed to be fun and entertaining. Sure, like most forms of entertainment there can be politics behind it. That’s not remotely surprising. But what is with this sudden trend of calling any little thing tying to be more inclusive as being a bad thing?

Why is it so wrong is a game wants to include a player character that’s female? How is that a bad thing? These toxic little boys need to get their panties out of their ass and realize that it’s a good thing if these companies want to court women as well as men. So many companies underestimate the purchasing power of women. It’s the same sort of thing that led people to say books about female characters wouldn’t do as well because boys wouldn’t read them (The Hunger Games), or that action/comic book movies with female leads wouldn’t do as well (Wonderwoman). It’s been proven patently false. Women have disposable income as well and they are more than willing to support things that include them, and they will support it an insane amount considering so few things come out to appeal to them.

And that’s a good thing. If a game is inclusive and appeals widely to both men and women, it will make more money. If it makes more money there’s going to be more support for the game and the publisher will be able to make more good games. And the cycle will continue and it will be a great thing.

Plus, what’s so wrong with having to play as a female character? I end up having to play as a male character in most of the games I play. And I genuinely don’t have a problem with it but you best believe the moment a game comes out where I can play as a female character or make my own female character, I will support it much more than those patently male games.

But apparently that makes me a bad person trying to kill gaming with the magical game killing power of my vagina or something.

SJW’s aren’t killing off gaming. Whiny men are killing the community.


musings · Uncategorized

Eugenics in Mass Effect and the Question it Poses

After some personal issues, I’m back with another meandering pointless post about video games!

Today I want to discuss Mass Effect: Andromeda. Again. Because despite the massive amount of shit the games getting, I still really like it and I enjoyed it a lot. Plus Jaal is probably one of the best Bioware boyfriends (after Dorian of course).

But there’s something I find myself thinking about when I play the Mass Effect games. Eugenics. Namely the Krogan problem as I like to call it. It’s a pretty interesting concept for a video game to include, mostly because it’s such a heavy subject. Eugenics is widely considered to be a terrible thing amongst most people (rightfully so). The idea is something supported by Nazis and other crazies who believe that there is a superior race (usually one they’re part of). It goes against everything that we as a society are supposed to believe in, at least for ourselves. We breed animals, dogs, cats, horses, to make them desirable. But as people we’re supposed to be above it. Not to mention the whole can of worms it opens about breeding out undesirable traits (race, sexuality, etc).

Which is why the way Mass Effect handles the Krogan is so interesting. Some of my favorite characters come from the new Mass Effect game and they’re Krogan. Drack is hilarious. He shows the love that the Krogan can possess for their family and I legit teared up a bit towards the end of his story arc with Kesh, who I also love. With characters like the, who you can’t help but love, it’s hard to justify the Genophage. These are characters you get to know during the course of the game and they become part of your character’s family. Seeing Kesh talk about trying to breed out the Genophage so that their children can survive.

However, in the second game Mordin makes a seemingly reasonable point about the Krogan. They did grow too much and destroy their homeworld. They were posed to destroy other worlds. Almost all the Krogans you meet are violent. They enjoy battling and they war against each other. They’re a bloodthirsty species so perhaps it was only appropriate for other species to step in and keep the peace.

But then again, Kesh doesn’t come across as remotely similar to the other Krogan. She’s actually a fairly apt politician. And for all his posturing, Drack is a kind, loving individual.

It’s interesting to ponder and there’s probably no right answer in the context of the games. But it’s something that should be thought about.

musings · Personal

I May Be An Adult But…

…damn if I don’t love sweet little simple kid’s games sometimes.

Not too long ago I invested in a 3DS. I saved up some money and then had to search all over town to get it since everywhere decided to be sold out of it when I wanted it. But eventually I found it, bought a couple of games, and I love it. It’s great for my lunch break when I don’t feel like watching anything or really doing much of anything. It’s also good for when I’m in a waiting room or something.

And even beyond that, some of the games are just great for relaxing at night after work. I’ve just bought Animal Crossing. It’s my first time ever playing the game and it’s just positively delightful. It’s colorful and sweet. There’s not too much to worry about doing, not too much to focus on.

It seems like so many people just like focusing on the challenge of games. If it’s not Dark Souls they don’t give a shit about it. I think there’s something to be said though for fun little games that don’t require much effort but calm you. We spend so much time just going, going, going that it’s nice to kick your feet up and chill.

musings · Personal

Why is Gaming Culture So Toxic?

No seriously.


This is something I find myself thinking of a lot of the time. I remember when I was a lot young games were just something that you played. A lot of the time with your family. I feel like there wasn’t this concept of a gamer as we now know it. Perhaps it was because we didn’t really have the internet, wireless wasn’t so much a thing so a lot of those games were couch co-op instead of being online. I imagine that has something to do with it. When you’re playing couch co-op chances are you’re with friends (unless you’re playing Mario Kart) so you’re not going to say all these foul things to them. And it’s fun.

Now though the culture has become so toxic and full of itself. It’s intimidating to pick up a multiplayer game as a first timer because you know you’re going to end up surrounded by people who’ve spent so much time getting good at the game. And there’s nothing quite as unpleasant at the screeching of some asshole upset because you’re not as good at them. It’s almost always men (boys, teenagers, adult men) who go up several octaves and then scream about raping people and toss around the word faggot. It’s unpleasant.

Add in being a girl and it’s just on a whole other level.

I don’t think I’ve spoken in a multiplayer game in a long time. I have a headset but I don’t use it. If I’m playing a multiplayer game I tend to keep the volume really low or off entirely because I don’t want to deal with people yelling at me for not being good. I want to have fun. That’s why I game, that’s why you should game. Sure, e-sports are a thing now. But if you were really that good, I would hope you wouldn’t get that worked up about it. You definitely shouldn’t be getting worked up over a girl playing the game with you either.

Gamers want to be accepted. They always rally against the stereotypes of the anti-social gamer, sitting in a dark basement somewhere but then they refuse to accept that maybe that stereotype has some merit. Maybe some people are taking this all too seriously and making everything shit.

Maybe I’d just like to be able to play a game and not have someone saying they’re going to rape me.

But that may be too much to ask.




Let’s Sexualize Male Video Game Characters!

Since I talked a bit about sexualization of female characters in video games, let’s sexualize male characters in video games for a bit.

There are tons of lists about there and discussion about the sexiest female characters in video games (it’s totally Cassandra from Dragon Age by the way) so I decided to make a post about some of the sexiest male characters in video games. There will be some minor spoilers for the characters and the games listed but nothing that ruins the actual plot of the games.

Jaal Ama Darav (Mass Effect Andromeda)

Jaal2A relatively recent hunk, Jaal from Mass Effect is probably one of the best romances in the game. The Angara are a new species that was introduced in the latest installment of Mass Effect. They’re a species mistrustful of strangers, long at war with the Kett. Jaal is a resistance fighter (along with several of his family members, including his mother) and is assigned to basically keep an eye on you. As you travel with him, you learn that his species is rather open emotionally and he never shies away from that. He’s a strong fighter, he’s funny, and it’s almost impossible to phase him. His banter between your other companions is always spot on. Plus he kind of looks like a dick.

Cullen Rutherford (Dragon Age Origins, Dragon Age 2, Dragon Age: Inquisition)

I really had to limit myself when it came to Bioware games because they have so many great and attractive characters of both genders. Cullen made the list because not only is he ruggedly handsome (and he wears that weird little furry thing over his armor which is so glam), he truly grew as a character between all three games. When you first meet him, he’s been abused and mentally tortured by mages. As such he wants you to kill them all without a thought. In the second game he’s started to recover. He takes his duties as a Templar seriously but it’s clear that he wants to help and genuinely does care about keeping people safe. Of course his boss turns out to be batshit. And then in Inquisition you can finally romance him. He’s a capable general and more than willing to lead your troops into battle. He only wants what’s best, even while struggling with a crippling drug addiction. And if you romance him, he starts to open up about his life. He’s a genuinely sweet character and it’s beyond perfect when he gets himself his first dog.

Genji Shimada (Overwatch)

Genji 2

Genji had a tough life. Once a young and carefree playboy, he was nearly killed by his older brother. Barely alive, Overwatch made him an offer. They’d rebuild his body if he would join them and help out. And so came to be the cyborg we know and love. He worked to destroy his family’s empire even while filled with self-loathing for the machine he had become. Eventually he found peace with the help of a robotic monk. I hate playing him in the game, he’s ridiculously hard for me to get a hang on. But I love his backstory and his design. He’s sleek and sexy. Still very much a man. And of course, dat robot ass.


Johnny Gat (Saints Row series) 

Okay. So he might be a psychopath who loves chaos and destruction. But he’s a sweet, loyal psychopath who loves chaos and destruction. It’s not good being on his bad side, after all he’s one of the most dangerous men in the galaxy. But when you’re on his good side, he’s fantastic. He’s loyal to a fault and willing to do whatever he wants to for his friends. Not to mention he was a romantic when it came to his relationship with Aisha and even years after her death, he’s still suffering from the guilt of it.

Ignis Scientia (Final Fantasy XV)


Sure, he’s not the most buff of your companions and he wears a shirt. But to be perfectly honest, Iggy is clearly the best of the boy band from this game. He has gravity defying hair, cute glasses, and sexy driving gloves. Plus he loves to cook and the meals he makes look positively delicious. There’s banter when you’re traveling where he notices that Noctis has a button coming loose on his clothing and he advises that he’s going to fix it for him. Who wouldn’t want a man who can cook and sew and loves driving you places?

Honorable Mention:

Erron Black (Mortal Kombat X)

Mortal Kombat X.png

Shirtless sweaty cowboy. ‘Nuff said.